Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
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