I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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