i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
