i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
