YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
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