Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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