Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
