Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Randomize
