I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Please, let me fuck your mom
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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