Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
