in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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