Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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