You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
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