Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
