I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
