I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize