just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize