maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
It's just like the Real World with babies
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
