Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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