You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
