I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
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