i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
meet me or not, i'm out of control
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
