I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
