i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
MIDGETS
????
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
