he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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