the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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