I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
