Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
