Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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