i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
so much tequila, so little girl.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Randomize
