is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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