worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
