How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Randomize
