Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize