I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises