$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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