i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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