You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
well you can't waste a boner
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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