I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
