your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
