what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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