I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
