Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
