idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize