Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize