Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
