Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
