he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
