So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
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