please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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